2004-02-25 : Too Much To Handle
It's been a couple of weeks and things have changed even more than I could have possibly begun to imagine. I think that I may have bitten off more than I can swallow.

Erin has moved out and will be married by the end of this week. I have gotten a puppy, who takes up every second of my time. I'm working two jobs and getting the least amount of sleep I have ever had in my whole life. I'm stressed and tired. I don't feel like eating anymore, because I'm usually just too tired to put in the effort of chewing and swallowing. And, to top it all off, I'm sick.

Yeah, I know what you are all thinking. I need to stop bitching, whining, and moaning and get the fuck over it.

But this is me we are talking about, and if you have ever read anything about me you will find that most of the time I am not difficult and when I do whine, it's usually right here in my world.

But, like I said, everything has changed and it really is freaking me out.

I never go out anymore and I don't mean that I go out one night a week compared to the four or five I used to do. I really mean never. Never ever. I get up, go to work, come home, go to sleep, and repeat. It's got to be this lack of down time that has made me sick. I only used to get sick when I put too much stuff on my plate and then ran out of time to finish it all.

Yeah, I know, there has got to be a point to all of this rambling, but I'm not so sure of what it is. I'm not so sure of a lot of things these days and it absolutely astounds me.

I think that what I need to do is to sit down with myself and determine what it is that I want to do, where it is that I want to go, and what it is that I want to accomplish when I get there.

Now I just need to pencil in an appointment with me. Maybe I'll find time in the car ride to work...

last * next