I'm in the process of being crushed.

I'm being crushed under a huge weight that comes from nowhere, yet seems to surround me.

It's everywhere.

I'm crushed by the opportunities that have passed me by.

I'm crushed by the chances of love and luck that I have let slip past me.

I'm crushed under the weight that I will never be what everyone else has expected me to be.

I can't go on like this.

I know that deep down in my heart the only opinion that matters is my own, but still, I worry about what the other people in my life think about me.

And it's so stupid.

So stupid to think that what they think is worth it all.

But it's still there.

I'm a mess. I've confessed to as much before.

I'm spastic, neurotic, and full of crap.

I run into stationary objects and injure myself often.

I love to love everyone, which often leads to misunderstandings of the way I throw around the word "love".

I am a nerd.

I can't commit to any type of relationship.

And, so, shit happens, and I end up the way I am now - a fucking mess.

I give up.

I guess whatever goes on will, well, just go the fuck on.

That just happens to explain my whole damn life.

I just fucking happens, and nothing more.