I had to work last night. Alone. All by myself at the upstairs bar. The most exciting thing that happened was that a Law and Order came on that I had not seen. I just sat there, listening to the fun going on below me, and not taking part in any of it. So, I used that time to think.
Yes, I had a moment of brilliant contemplation as I sat on my barstool watching TV with closed captioning.
I started off feeling very lonely and wanting another person to talk to. Anyone would have done, as long as they would be able to make sense and not stare at my chest through the whole conversation. But, honestly, in a bar, would that ever really happen? Nope, never.
But then, as time went marching on all around me, I realized that I was fine being alone. I spend my whole life with other people. Almost every waking hour is devoted to some kind of social activity. So, I spent my time talking to myself.
That's right, I said talking to myself.
Now, don't go thinking that I was acting like one of the crazies down near the bus stop that talks to themselves in muttering chatter that every now and then breaks out into full blasted yelling. I mean that I held an internal dialogue with someone that I should know a lot better.
I learned that I really like my job, even though it can be boring an slow some days.
I learned that I think about sex a lot.
I learned that I enjoy singing along to the music in my head.
I learned that I enjoy my own company.
And, come on now, how many people do you know that can say:
I am enough.